It was in college that she realized her racial inferiority as an asian woman.
Like most other Asian girls that she were close friends with, she was shy, but studious, smart but timid, pretty but humble. She went to school and went home, never went out to parties or even intermingled much with other classmates, but also like most of her Asian girlfriends, she led a very lonely life, devoid of romance and sex; though on the surface she always smiled and seemed not to have a care in the world, deep in the burrows of her heart, she was burning with lust and desire.
But most important of all, she lusted after white men. Ever since she first got into college, she has dreamed of being with a tall, handsome white man which as an idea both fascinated her and intimidated her.
For just like every other Asian girl she knew, she has been badly hurt by the effete, timid, and spineless Asian guys, who had no semblance nor do they have any conception as to the concept of man, as western men do.
It was the culmination of her life time of sadness and joy, loving hate and hating love, when she too lost her virginity to a white man.
Her best friend was another Chinese girl from Hong Kong and she had confided to her that she lost her virginity to her then boyfriend, a white man whom she met in her econ class, and she knew that she too wanted to date a white man, a superior race of men.
But she did not foresee the consequence. Not only did the white man take her virginity, he also broke her heart and tortured her soul. She had become very clingy afterward and followed him around all day like his little asian concubine, and he was annoyed. But in order to be with him, she did everything she could. She catered to his every demand. He wanted to take pictures of her naked body. She acquiesced. He wanted to videotape their sex sessions. She acquiesced. He wanted to share their sex session videos with his other buddies. Like the obedient Asian daughter who submitted to her parents like a slave to her kings, she acquiesced. “I’m now his property, so I will do everything for him,” she said to herself, and obeyed his every will.
Unbeknown to her, she had become known as the asian slut to all his friends at his fraternity.
Like most Asian girls, she enjoyed the ropes, and had such intense feelings of pleasure and shame when her white boyfriend stripped her naked, tied her up, suspended her in the midair and had his way with her, subjugating her with his belt, his hand, his gorgeous white cock, sometimes even his fist as he used her as his punching bag.
She, on the other hand, enjoyed being beaten by a white man. She was immersed in the pleasure and joy of being subjugated by a supreme white man.
But unbeknown to her, while he was dating her and having sex with her, he was simultaneously dating several other asian girls. He even bragged to others that he was the Asian virgin breaker, since all the asian girls he dated have all been virgins.
And when she found out, she felt sick to her stomach, knowing that all of them had lost their virginity to the same white guy.
She felt a sense of self-hatred and inferiority complex like she had never experienced before. She dyed her hair blonde and actively flirted with several other white guys. She catered to their every demand. She felt so powerless in front of those white guys.
To her, it just felt so natural to be naked in front of them, to be either on her knees or on her back, begging to suck their cocks or getting ready to be fucked in her tight asian pussy.
But it was never enough for them. First they demanded that she sucked their cocks and swallowed their sperm. Which she did with the utmost diligence, which she did with the same zeal that she applied to her school work. She licked their balls and twirled her tongue on the tip of their penises like an experienced asian prostitute and she even allowed them to film the whole session. In return they grabbed her hair and fucked her mouth like a flesh light, often gagging her and making her suffer, and when she resisted, they threatened to leave her. “No, please, don’t leave me.” She often screamed in her heart. She was the typical asian girl who becomes extremely clingy after being used. She would rather become their slave, to be dragged around and used and abused rather than being abandoned.
She was not the strong, independent western woman. She was the weak, submissive asian woman who would do anything to be with her white man.
On the one hand she felt a joy in her submission—when they demanded that she not touch their cocks as they brutally facefucked her, she put her hands behind her back and pretended that they were handcuffed behind her back and she took pride on her self discipline to obey—on the other hand she felt a feeling of utter worthlessness. She was now a cheap asian whore, a dirty chink whore, who was being used by multiple men. It felt contrary to her morality, her ancient, out of date Asian morality that dictated that women should be chaste.
Even though she always swallowed their cum, she still demanded that when they fuck her pussy, they wore a condom. She did not want to get pregnant yet. She was only a college student and not yet old enough to drink. She was wishing that one of them would marry her one day and she would start a family. Nothing is more blissful in this world than to be a mother, she always knew.
But they demanded to fuck her pussy without a condom. It was the most horrendous demand for her yet. She did not mind swallowing their cum, but to receive their cum inside her vagina, that scared her. What if she become pregnant? She begged them not to do that, but then they threatened, if she did not agree to it, they would leave her. And in fact this was what happened. It had happened too often by then that she had lost all control over her own life.
As soon as the first “no” came out of her mouth, the white guy who was with her would instantly leave and cut off all connections with her. She was desperate for their love, their approval and their presence she did everything for them. She is the asian cum dumpster for white guys. She is their worthless little chink fucktoy.
She still excelled in school. She was the top student in her class, and she was about to graduate as a honor’s student. Even though her private sex life was a mess.
She became known as the asian cum dumpster. Every white guy could have her as long as he was white. And they all loved to fuck her in the ass, because, one, they never used condoms, and second, they said, this way they didn’t have to worry about getting her pregnant and having a half-white-half-chink baby. She had been pumped and dumped by so many white guys that she had lost count, and not only was she exhausted physically, she was even more devastated emotionally. She cried almost everyday. She cried whenever she was alone, and she even cried when she was with them, knowing that once they have gotten what they wanted from her, they would leave her. They would say she was too clingy and they liked girls who are more independent and they would dump her.
She realized that as an asian girl, she was never going to be good enough to become the girlfriend of one of those white guys.
For the next ten years, she had lived in solitude. She no longer dated. She had become dead inside. She felt nothing.
Yet to a white guy, she was nothing more than a worthless asian whore like millions of other asian girls that he could easily conquer. The more she thought about how worthless she is, the more she enjoyed being beaten and humiliated. She started to seek out sadistic white guys who treated her like a slave, someone who would beat her, fuck her and use her as a toilet, someone who did not hesitate to share her with his friends like the asian whore that she is, and it was only at this point that she has found peace within herself. She has realized that as an inferior asian girl, this is her natural role in the world. No matter how much education she has, no matter how much money she makes, in the presence of a white man, she would always remain as an inferior asian slave.